A word on festive stress: You don't have to do it all! 🌪// Transcript of ‘I Feel For You’ podcast episode 26
Darling! Hope to share useful resources and encouragement to inspire and delight without ignoring the difficult stuff. Cause you know, life can be tricky baby, you have to stay in your magic! …Is that a lyric?or a cheesy pinterest quote? Either way, as the excellent rnb band Hi Five would say in their song, Unconditional Love, taken from the soundtrack to Menace 2 society in 1993, which still applies to this day,
Ok so this is a minisode or reminder or mindful loving squeeze that i hope will warm your cockles and offer you support during the season. Cause you don’t have to do it all. It’s also part of a series that i like to think of as being an emergency blanket festive pack, which i hope will serve you to stay connected to yourself and spacious during the busy season.
It’s adapted from an original blog post i wrote this time last year, when attempting to walk through town one day. I hope you dig it! And as always, the conversation continues after the episode, reach out to me and let me know where you’re listening from, perhaps share your thoughts and ideas, i’d love to connect with you. You can reach me via email ifeelforyoupodcast.com or reach out to me via socials. Instagram is a good bet! I’m dionne with 7 underscores cause i’m extra. But you know this is how we do.
Let’s get into this shall we?
I’m noticing signs of seasonal stress these days (which isn’t my fave type of vibe fyi). Jostled roughly by a bunch of bags (not a euphemism!), clapped on the backside by another, a few ankle rams and kicks from enthusiastic shoppers, peeved that i’m walking too slow and in their path to the entrance for their next store, hurried impatient ushering through the supermarket with a few “tsks” here and there: it’s a busy time of year. Busy busy. Blah blah.
Perhaps it’s because i don’t have the funds to go on a shopping bender but i’m far from being swept into the panic that envelopes so many around this time. In fact, i dread it, often stunned into disbelief of the urgency to 🚨"complete your xmas shopping first because there are only such and such many shopping days until xmas"🙅🏽♀️...yawn.
I’m not hating on the organised, rather, i resent the pressure to do what everybody else is doing just because "that’s what we are supposed to do", following the absurd rules military-style and with awkward appropriation of a weirdly commercialised concept (#hygge anyone?!). Where’s the meaning? What’s the reason? How are you...feeling?
Of course, the reality is i AM swept into the panic, because i can feel it and see it all around. All focus feels like it’s on making sure Christmas is alright so we can forget about the mess of 2017. I’m not hating on that either. And i’m not against people finding ways to feel better that work for them. Why not plunge some effort into making something beautiful. I’m here for it. But if it’s ending up stressing us out, and/or belittling others, surely it misses the point?
So this week we’ve been entertaining the idea of "not having to do it all".
I think this works on so many levels. In a world urging us to buy this or that in an attempt to make up for an authentic connection or to mask over that unspoken rift that’s been bubbling under the surface but is never spoken, in a job that squeezes us in ways that hurts, in a yoga class that seems to be full of gymnasts whilst we feel like the tinman - surely we could all benefit from taking a step back from the noise to examine what really matters.
Are you connected? To yourself, and to the things that matter? Are you supporting yourself in a way that feels nourishing - and if that’s not possible, can you reach out for support so that you can? Getting right with yourself is where everything else begins. I catch myself sometimes when i’m not feeling very connected - the need to somehow keep up takes over. A worry blurted out that really comes from a place of lack - which really comes from a place of thinking i need to be keeping up with someone else who’s on a completely different road. It’s absurd really isn’t it?
The bottom line?
We’re all coasting around in these meat suits, hovering on a planet that’s suspended in the universe somewhere. Here we are, magical beans, made of stars and dirt and excellent stuff, caught up in stress and comparison. We know it’s the thief of joy, right?
So this week, a challenge (and as much for me as an offering for anyone else who needs it!)
Can you find a way to stay close to yourself? That might be through an activity that makes you feel more "you", or exploring a way of listening deeply to what’s really true for you, or perhaps it’s dog whispering. Or a combination of those things and more.
Listen deeply to yourself. Create the rituals that work for you, regardless or not if they fit in with everybody else's.
If you’re feeling the pressure to keep up, or if stress is biting at your heels, try doing the opposite and slowing down instead - the best time to self care is when we don´t have time for it! It will give you a chance to take stock and get clear, plus you’ll surely feel more "you" afterwards!
Don’t feel bad for being selective - your energy is precious, spend it wisely (and in ways that are most meaningful to you!)
And if it’s difficult, start with a smaller morsel - perhaps a simple reminder to yourself regularly that you don’t have to do it all.
You are enough.
Keep it spacious babes!
P.S here’s a selection of yoga videos for you if you fancy practicing with me and making some space for yourself during the busy season!